The season Of Love is here! At least that‘s how it is perceived! Usually when one thinks of love, then one mostly thinks of the erotica or the romantic kind of love. The emphasis is clearly on this human level activity; hearts and symbols of the cupid’s arrow visibly unrestrained. For the commercial world it is a whole lot of profitable activity, filled with cards and gifts specifically designed (otherwise who would buy them!) with prominent symbols that depict the erotica of love.
Almost everyone wants to make this a memorable occasion; Meeting at special places, doing special things, and wearing special clothes and saying special things. Shall I say; Love has overflowed into things material and we could very well be holding on to this special memorabilia and find satisfaction in things, as they keeps filling our memories. Music and movies add a special tinge to the whole experience as they touch those sensual emotions of life. Memories need not be burdened to recapitulate even what is lost for what is lost is largely unknowingly and rarely knowingly gained with the accessibility through modern gadgets.
What is this love steeped in substantially, if not in the mere sense of oneself? - The desire to possess, even to the extent of destroying the other. In the Greek terminology we have four terms for Love while in the Hindu concept we have three terms and one interestingly means destruction (TAMSIK). I miss you and therefore I can’t do without you. The ‘I’ is no dormant entity but a prominent one which seeks the other for one’s own self. It doesn’t easily want to share what is not his, and will even not easily accept the consequence of one’s action. This ‘I” could reach such abnormal proportion that it will even seek the destruction of the other.
Therefore we have abundance of cases where people in order to woo the other, in the name of love, will go to any extent of seduction, spiritual activism, seeking help in esoteric and occult practices and luring through display of one’s talent and wealth. The milder seductive activity could be writing poems and chatting, increased communication, special attention, even indulging in attention seeking behaviour, grooming of oneself, additionally with make–up, new dresses, special perfumes and pheromones, plastic surgery, etc. A whole change of lifestyle and outlook has begun to occur.
The above reflection on the nature of erotica,love does not reject the beauty and the magnificence of it thereof. God had a plan when He created life forms. Imagine life without the erotica! Creation would have given up the idea of procreation in order to achieve a greater fulfillment steeped in one’s wickedness. Without an element of that commitment and sacrifice that is associated with erotica there would have been more room for the growth of a hedonistic self-centered activity where ultimately the creature seeks the destruction of the other for survival.
The erotica is a reality which we cannot escape. It exists and has a place in society. If ordered well it can be a blessing to society and its vigorous functions. The erotica if it leads to responsible commitment best imitates the divine love. It may seem similar in many respects but yet they are two distinct. Bliss and happiness are the fruit thereof which leads to procreation and new life. Yet these are short term gains. Those who see this and have been able to be of a controlled mind have sought to rise above this emotional tangle to achieve something which they have decided is a priority of life.
We as humans find our fulfillment in the love and service of the other. To serve and reach out to others in love, caring and sharing, is the noblest of human activity. The Erotica could not only bring about this reality but also makes known to human beings a deeper reality which is many a time beyond his comprehension; the reality of loving a particular being and sharing your all with the one in your life and through him or her to others.
Erotica as love by itself is mere passion or an emotion which if ordered well can be a great blessing. The individual’s character adds beauty and grace to erotica; Commitment, responsibility and the fruit of the Holy Spirit such as peace, Joy, patience, kindness, goodness, etc.,(Gal.5:22-23) only adds to its substance. One normally rejects spirituality as opposing to erotica and will seek to further one’s action towards hedonistic self seeking pleasures. Whereas the opposite is true the spiritual man enjoys this gift of God and completely and wholly benefits from the fruit thereof.
On the one hand we have the evil that is erotica (not because erotica is evil but the manner of its expression is what makes it good or bad), and on the other hand we have the beauty which erotica is all about. The evil of erotica is due to a factor extrinsic to it while the beauty of erotica is an intrinsic quality fortified by the fruit of the Holy Spirit. When the external is taken care of through the realization of our human faults and fallings then erotica becomes that first step in the pilgrimage of authentic growth. The primary step is always Jesus our saviour in that long journey of life. “Apart from me you can do nothing. “(Jn. 15:5) He gives us His grace to overcome these evils that so strongly assails us. (Rom. 7:14ff)
Where should the action of erotica lead us to? What is that ultimate growth and destiny of erotica if not the eternity of the human race. The limitation of erotica is the limitedness of the two. How can two mortals lead each other into immortality? But two mortals can lead each other into immortality in Him who offers us the gift of immortality and makes of us the sacrament of immortality to the other and even to the whole human race.
For apart from Him, the search for the great human need to love and more so to be loved with selfish intent could lead us to that pitfall of erotica, which is affection bordered on pampering and self gratification, leading to stagnation and ruin. But with Him we triumph in spite of our fall. The fall only reveals our frailty and could make us humble to submit to the all powerful entity; God Himself.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, creator of all things that is good, help me even as I appreciate the beauty of love you have placed in our hearts when you created us and take away from me every lustful contamination. In the midst of my sinfulness help me to recognize and submit to your great possibilities which are in spite of my weaknesses. Give me the help of your Holy Spirit and guide me by your voice. I ask this in the name of Jesus my Lord and Master.
I agree with Fr Conrad. Its quite interesting how the world interprets love in so many different ways and yet forget that Love comes from God, and there can be only 1 interpretation of it.
ReplyDelete1 Cor 13:4-7 is read by default at most wedding masses. But if love was lived by what is mentioned in it, we would never hear about such things as broken marriages. SO I think its time that we stopped interpreting Love the way we think of it, and rather love as God wants us too.